b'If you find it comforting to talk about your loved one, let your family and friends know that; tell them not to be afraid to mention your loved ones nameSome survivors find it comforting to acknowledge the birthday of their loved one by gathering with his/her friends and family; others prefer to spend it privatelySome survivors have found the following ritual helpful for a variety of occasions: Light two candles, and then blow one out; explain that the extinguished candle represents those weve lost, while the one that continues to burn represents those of us who go on despite our loss and painSimply leave the one candle burning (you can put it off to one side) for the duration of the holiday meal or event; the glowing flame acts as a quiet reminder of those who are missingAbove all, bear in mind that there is no right way to handle holidays, anniversaries, or birthdays; you and your family may decide to try several different approaches before finding one that feels best for youFor Your FriendsWhen friends ask how they can help, you might want to give them a copy of this section.When there has been a death of a loved one by suicide, survivors will experience a depth and range of feelings. It is important to honor and respect the needs of the survivors in the days, weeks and months following the suicide. Often you may feel helpless. These guidelines help you understand what may be comforting to the family. However, before you assume 12 Surviving a Suicide Loss'